Now don’t get me wrong, I love my iPhone. In fact, if gay marriage were legal in California, I might marry her. That’s right, it’s a she. A sexy, sassy, stylish she with productivity, power and a passion for Oregon Trail to boot. But as much as I love her, our relationship can sometimes be a little rocky. Sometimes she doesn’t communicate as quickly as I want her to, and she does have a tendency to over accessorize. In fact, I think my former colleague Eugene is pretty much spot on in all of his assessments of my baby’s shortcomings. Not that I don’t love her anyway. But hey, we all need to let off iSteam every once in a while, right?